When I was at home stretch of my pregnancy with Sophia, many moms kept telling me to get lots of sleep and "me" time. I laughed because I figured that sleep with a newborn was overrated. Or that I totally knew what I was doing as a first time mom and get lots of sleep. HA!
I didn't realize how much me time (or pamper time I like to call it) was hard to come by when we decided that I would be a work at home mom. I thought that being a mom also meant to devote as much as my time as possible to mothering my baby. WRONG. It made me crazy. Add that to post-pregnancy hormones, breastfeeding, and lack of sleep. Yep, I was a bitch, with a capital B.
Thankfully my hubby realized before I did that I need time away from him and the baby. Back when she was little, it involved a one woman date with my iced mocha and some art magazines at Borders Books.
Nowadays, pamper time involves a super hot bath (I'm cooking the baby, as hubby jokes) with the latest bubbly concoction or bath salts I've acquired. The most important part of this is a pile of magazines. I'm a totally magazine whore. I love reading magazines. With a 3 year old keeping me busy, the short articles in magazines are about how I long I can focus on reading. Sometimes if I'm being an overachiever, I'll listen to some crafting podcasts while I read magazines.
So I run my bath, light candles, and load up on O. Magazine, Martha Stewart Living, Entertainment Weekly, Wired, Discover, Smithsonian, and whatever else I haven't read yet. I might only get through 1 or 2 (if I'm lucky) magazines, but it's the potential, right? When the water gets cold, I'll let out some water and add more hot water! I soak and read until I'm all pruney. I try to do this at least once a week.
Every woman needs something they love to do outside of kids and life partners. By spending time doing something that you love that doesn't involved your family, you are showing them how important it is to be your own person. Not to mention that they'll appreciate you more.
I'm a big advocate of pamper time, and bring this up at every Passion Party I do. Pamper time is especially important so you can transition your brain out of mom and housewife mode for "I'm hot and sexy" mode. Who wants to worry about dirty laundry or unloading the dishwasher while you're trying to get it on with your lover? That's definitely a mood killer.
I know sex isn't the most important aspect of a marriage/relationship, but it's definitely at the top. Sometimes when you're parenting young children, sleep might seem sexier. Intimacy will help you reconnect with your partner. Having sex makes you want more sex. Crazy, right? Plus it burns calories, bonus! If you need extra motivation, pick up a fun lotion, lickable goodie, or battery operated helpers to try out. The anticipation of trying them out makes great foreplay!
Do you have pamper time? Or me time? What do you like to do?
Photo via Dennis Wong
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5 comments:
Well, having more me time means LESS sex, so.....
An interesting but true take on me-time. I don't if you saw this link I tweeted earlier today about a new study on why women have sex. It's definitely got some discussions starters for your parties. http://tinyurl.com/kvd2ra
Kim, that's very interesting! I think women and men view sex very differently.
For men, who are very tactile, sex is a way the communicate with their (female) partners. Women, on the other hand, love to talk, so that's our preferred method of intimacy. (Gross generalizations, of course).
Do you think that women don't view sex as fun and pleasurable, they're more apt to use sex as a way to get what they want? Or it could be cultural. Or if they do view sex as fun, they might be considered slutty or whorish?
I like to sit in a hot bath in my bathroom and read as long as humanly possible. In my house that isn't very long. To get any peace I have to lock my bedroom door and my bathroom door. And then I'll still hear the pounding.
http://theprovidentwoman.com
Re-discovering baths in lieu of showers is one of the best things I ever did for myself!
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